[Carnak]

My Mom used to cause huge fights between my sister and I.
Until we began comparing notes,seems mom isn't really 100 percent anymore either.
Plus the doctor put her on some sleep medication.
We talk every other day, one time she called me crying wanting to know why i never call her.
It took forever to convince her we talk often. Freaking ambien had her having lengthy intelligent conversations she never remembered.

Zack

You got to play along with it, and just tell her you love her and say sorry for not calling

My father-in-law likes his stories, you hear them over and over. Now I am talking before he was stricken. And like the fish that got away, the stories exaggerate and grow.

Except if my mother-in-law was around when he was retelling his stories, she would be on him, correcting him, busting his balls so he could not progressively exaggerate.

But after he was strickened, she would not let up on it, and would be correcting him on the day to day things, going the extra yard basically to prove to him that he has losing his marbles. SHe was not doing it on purpose, it is how she was but the effect could be to get him worked up almost into a rage. He would take off, go wondering, you would have to go look for him.

Now it was easy for me, I am not living there and was basically up there for a three week visit. He would seem fine at times, but then conversations would get a little confusing and as soon as I figured out that 'he thought I was my dad' or ' he thought he was still living in his old house etc' I just played along rather than correct him to tell him he was losing his marbles.

One of his son's took that approach as well. The old guy was trying to start a lawn mower, and you just had to let him try. Then when he goes into the house for a drink, you check, see it is out of gas, add some then subtly hint he should try again. The mower starts and he would say "I must of flooded it"

Some times care homes are just what you have to do. For old people in general, my theory is they view this as 'the final chapter', they know they are only coming out when they are dead.

For my FIL, he wired the hospital, the old folks homes the care homes. Sometimes he thinks he is in there working again, sometimes he has his marbles back and knows where he is and it sucks.

WInters are sub-arctic up where he is, and he was taking off at Christmas time at 3AM and could have been freezing to death trying to walk from his daughters house to his old house where he has not lived for a couple years. 30 below zero. His wife was recovering from double bypass surgery at the time, and he started with the "sundowning" symptoms, so they ended up telling him he had to get tests down for his sore back at the hospital. He has since been in supervised care since.

I looked at what the Mayo Clinic said about the disease, and what I thought were minor symptoms like confusing me with my father meant he was half way gone.

 

[Carnak]

No one on their death bed says, "I wish I could of worked more".

But when old ones start to lose it, you can say, I wish I would of spent some more time with them before they were gone

 

[heavymetaldad]

great reply carnak

 

[heavymetaldad]

lost my pops 3 years ago due to oldtimers with stroke complications. it's hard to witness someone you love dearly deteriorate health wise,mentally, and physically

 

[timebuilder]

My mom, who just turned 80, is staying with us over the weekend. She hasn't been to our home in a few months and my sister, who my mom now lives with, told us that mom is getting pretty bad with the memory.

I did not expect my mom not to know who I was when my wife first brought her to our home. My mom was afraid to get out of my wife's car to come into the house because she didn't know where she was or why she was there. It also took her a few minutes to remember who I was.

After about 15 minutes, mom started to remember certain things. She would then repeat these things dozens of times over during the day. After taking mom shopping and out for lunch, she seemed to be doing pretty well.

When we got back home, mom took a nap in a recliner in our living room. When mom woke up from her nap, she was in a panic. She again had no idea where she was or who my wife and I were. She wanted to know where my dad was. My dad passed away almost three years ago. It is really heartbreaking to see someone have to go through the pain of being told that here husband and youngest daughter are both dead, over and over each time they wake from a sleep.

Just wondering if anyone else is dealing with this or has dealt with it and how it goes for you.

She sounds like a pretty advanced case. Is she on Aricept yet?

My mom passed a few years ago, and my dad has a friend now who is definitely on this path. We got her to go to a doc and get the medicine, but I'm not sure she takes it all the time.

The right meds can be a big help. You might want to look into that aspect of care.

 

[RoBoTeq]

Clint's character killed two birds with one stone-- a sacrifice, dies sprawled out in the crucifiction pose for symbolism.

I guess offing yourself spares your spouse, but it is a selfish moitive and not a sacrifice.

Yea, but if we knew we were going to die real soon anyway, and there was a way to go out quickly while doing a really good deed for someone else, I hope I have the nads to do such a thing.

 

[RoBoTeq]

My father died in 2004 from a heart attack riding in the car with my mother. The last 12 - 14 months of his life was when the alzhiemers got bad. we suspected it for as long as 10 years prior in the form of paranoid behavior and other things in the way he saw the world. I remember the night I had to go take his car away from him, I will never forget that look when I drove off.

Not being able to drive, or in any other way be mobile enough to get away from my mom's constant badgering him, was the worse thing my dad endured as well. In my opinion, he lasted too long in a terrible physical condition, yet I still feel horrible about wishing it were over for him so he did not have to continue feeling the physical pain and feeling of helplessness.

Turns out I am wrong about my mom not having alzheimers. Lisa tells me it is alzheimers and it will get much worse.

 

[RoBoTeq]

My Mom as Not senile but she just had a major surgery and needs attention and pick up after shes 68 and does not take care of her self the way she should at 68 i live across the street from her so does my sister and we take care of her, if things get bad she will move in with me im really not looking forward to it but its Mom.

That is great that you guys are so close. My dad needed constant care in his last years and my mom was capable of caring for him. She did take care of the essentials, but she also tortured him by controlling every aspect of his life.

 

[RoBoTeq]

It's a horrible disease. As Carnak stated, it starts off slow and then, out of the blue it seems, progresses rapidly. I have many stories I could share, but it just about breaks my heart to tell them.
I hope your mother gets better. I'm glad she is not diagnosed with Alzheimer's. We can all be grateful to God for that.

As I responded to Jayhawker, it turns out I was wrong about her not having alzheimers. I don't talk to my sister since my dad's funeral, so I don't get all of the information on my mom and my wife knows it bothers me for her to talk about what my sister discusses with her. I know I am not being reasonable about that, my sister is a good person, but I cannot forgive her for how she handled my dad's funeral.

As for being grateful to God; I am grateful that God has allowed my mom not to remember how horrible she was to my dad. All my mom knows is that she misses him and how good they got along together. If putting out fires with gasoline is considered getting along, well that's about the only way I can see that they got along.

 

[RoBoTeq]

I seriously think my Dad has the beginnings of some memory issue. I went to Delaware with him in May for my uncles funeral, man what an eye opener, most time I have spent with him in years................he is definitely loosing it.

My step monster isn't much better, but she really isn't my problem.

Step monster.....that's terrible. Funny, but terrible.

 

[RoBoTeq]

Zack

You got to play along with it, and just tell her you love her and say sorry for not calling

My father-in-law likes his stories, you hear them over and over. Now I am talking before he was stricken. And like the fish that got away, the stories exaggerate and grow.

Except if my mother-in-law was around when he was retelling his stories, she would be on him, correcting him, busting his balls so he could not progressively exaggerate.

But after he was strickened, she would not let up on it, and would be correcting him on the day to day things, going the extra yard basically to prove to him that he has losing his marbles. SHe was not doing it on purpose, it is how she was but the effect could be to get him worked up almost into a rage. He would take off, go wondering, you would have to go look for him.

Now it was easy for me, I am not living there and was basically up there for a three week visit. He would seem fine at times, but then conversations would get a little confusing and as soon as I figured out that 'he thought I was my dad' or ' he thought he was still living in his old house etc' I just played along rather than correct him to tell him he was losing his marbles.

One of his son's took that approach as well. The old guy was trying to start a lawn mower, and you just had to let him try. Then when he goes into the house for a drink, you check, see it is out of gas, add some then subtly hint he should try again. The mower starts and he would say "I must of flooded it"

Some times care homes are just what you have to do. For old people in general, my theory is they view this as 'the final chapter', they know they are only coming out when they are dead.

For my FIL, he wired the hospital, the old folks homes the care homes. Sometimes he thinks he is in there working again, sometimes he has his marbles back and knows where he is and it sucks.

WInters are sub-arctic up where he is, and he was taking off at Christmas time at 3AM and could have been freezing to death trying to walk from his daughters house to his old house where he has not lived for a couple years. 30 below zero. His wife was recovering from double bypass surgery at the time, and he started with the "sundowning" symptoms, so they ended up telling him he had to get tests down for his sore back at the hospital. He has since been in supervised care since.

I looked at what the Mayo Clinic said about the disease, and what I thought were minor symptoms like confusing me with my father meant he was half way gone.

I figured this out as well. When my mom doesn't know who I am, I do gently remind here until it comes back to her. But when it comes to the things that just don't matter, I let her go on with what she thinks occured at the moment. I know I must have answered every question mom had at least two dozen times each this weekend. It only does harm to tell her that I just answered that question a minute ago.
The worst part is her having to realize sad events over and over, day after day. She has to relive the initial pain of losing her husband and her one daughter several times a day. No matter how she treated my dad, it breaks my heart to see her have to realize he is dead over and over again. There is no closure to these things for her.

 

[RoBoTeq]

She sounds like a pretty advanced case. Is she on Aricept yet?

My mom passed a few years ago, and my dad has a friend now who is definitely on this path. We got her to go to a doc and get the medicine, but I'm not sure she takes it all the time.

The right meds can be a big help. You might want to look into that aspect of care.

She is on all kinds of meds. With as frail and thin as she is now, it's a wonder the meds alone don't fill her up. Even so, she has a good apetite and eats most any kind of foods. It would be nice if she remembered an hour after eating that she ate though.

One of the reasons for her having to be cared for constantly and not be allowed to live alone any longer was that she kept forgetting to eat or drink water. She was wasting away and had to be hospitalized for dehydration before my sister took her in with her and her husband.

 

[marvin]

reading this thread makes me so thankful that my mom who is in her late 80 s
is still in very good shape. constantly taking my sis who has a rare artery disease to her dr. appts. & her younger sis to the dr. or shopping.
getting old wouldnt be too bad if a person could be in as good a shape as mom is. i call her at least 3/ 4 times a week.

 

[WhoIsThat?]

who is in her late 80 s
is still in very good shape.

That's what this book is about.
http://www.google.com/search?client=safari&rls=en-us&q="the+rectangular+curve"&ie=UTF-8&oe=UTF-8
There is a built-in max. lifespan for people [~85], with some very few living to be 120.
The best is to live in reasonably good health until the end and then spend a week or two going to pieces all at once.

 

[Some Dude]

I had a friend whose wife was showing these symptoms. These are also associated with heavy metal poisoning or a few decades worth of allopathic drugs in the system.. There are several things that do help.
Pinto beans
Any green food. There are several types of seaweed that help as well. Cilantro is a great one as well for those who would like to take another approach.

 

[WhoIsThat?]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alzheimer's_disease

This Aricept doesn't get such good marks.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Donepezil

 

[RoBoTeq]

reading this thread makes me so thankful that my mom who is in her late 80 s
is still in very good shape. constantly taking my sis who has a rare artery disease to her dr. appts. & her younger sis to the dr. or shopping.
getting old wouldnt be too bad if a person could be in as good a shape as mom is. i call her at least 3/ 4 times a week.

That is great marvin. Taking care of your sister may be part of why your mom stays in such good shape, she has a noble purpose.

 

[RoBoTeq]

I had a friend whose wife was showing these symptoms. These are also associated with heavy metal poisoning or a few decades worth of allopathic drugs in the system.. There are several things that do help.
Pinto beans
Any green food. There are several types of seaweed that help as well. Cilantro is a great one as well for those who would like to take another approach.

I developed alzheimers symptoms in my 30s. Turned out to be a chemical sensitivity. Aside from my normal bodily chemical imbalances for which I take meds for, I am also extremely prone to having adverse affects from chemical additives to foods and chemical scents.

Chemical additives to foods, especially those to lower fat and sugar content, leech out your bodies vitamins and minerals. If you become prone to loosing too much of your bodies B vitamins, you will be prone to loosing your memory and become easily irate. Vitamin B12 and B6 are essential for comprehension. Without comprehension, we get confused, which makes us irritable, and lose our memories.

 

[Some Dude]

I developed alzheimers symptoms in my 30s. Turned out to be a chemical sensitivity. Aside from my normal bodily chemical imbalances for which I take meds for, I am also extremely prone to having adverse affects from chemical additives to foods and chemical scents.

Chemical additives to foods, especially those to lower fat and sugar content, leech out your bodies vitamins and minerals. If you become prone to loosing too much of your bodies B vitamins, you will be prone to loosing your memory and become easily irate. Vitamin B12 and B6 are essential for comprehension. Without comprehension, we get confused, which makes us irritable, and lose our memories.

Thats what i said those mentioned herbs will leach the chemicals , heavy metals and older drug residue out of the system.
Ive seen remarkable results with this. Including one person who saw people who weren't there.
Disease is actually two words dis ease something is upsetting your bodies natural ease. Eliminating those substances can do a great deal towards helping our bodies to heal themselves, or we can all continue to medicate ourselves into oblivion , myself included at times.

 

[corny]

My mom had alzheimers...you and your mom will be in our prayers here...

Be strong